How to assess your own interpersonal communication skills

How to assess your own interpersonal communication skills

Good interpersonal skills are a fundamental part of any successful relationship, whether at home, your workplace, or school. If you want to be a good communicator, you must be skilled in all the aspects of interpersonal communication. Even though soft skills like communication can be hard to measure, understanding these skills will help you identify areas in which you might improve.

How to assess your interpersonal communication skill

To assess your interpersonal communication skills, you can ask yourself the following questions:

  1. How well can I anticipate and predict possible causes for confusion and miscommunication, and how good am I at dealing with them upfront?
  2. How often do recipients fully understand my messages, emails, or other documents? Do I give enough information and detail?
  3. Do I ask questions when I don’t understand something, or do I keep it to myself?
  4. Do people often misunderstand my messages? Am I often surprised that they don’t understand what I am saying?
  5. Is it easy for me to understand someone else’s point of view during a conversation?
  6. Do I think about how my responses will be perceived by others, or do I speak without thinking? 
  7. Can I use communication platforms such as email to quickly and efficiently communicate complex issues?
  8. Do I find it difficult to see and read people’s body language?
  9. Do I struggle to find the right words to convey my message?

If you find it difficult to answer any of these questions, it might be something to think about. You might want to write down the areas in which you are struggling and reconsider your approach to communication and receiving information. That being said, even someone who has answered these questions with the utmost confidence might still have room for improvement. Even if you think you are the world’s mos skilled communicator, there is no downside to learning new skills and improving on the ones you have.

Why Improve Interpersonal Skills?

Communication is essential if you want to advance your career. This skill will help you to get customers, maintain relationships, negotiate, and conflict resolution. Here are some interpersonal skills that are particularly important to look at:

  • Verbal communication skills

This includes your ability to speak clearly and concisely, and appropriately. You should be able to choose the correct tone of voice and vocabulary for the given situation. For example, you might speak differently when giving a eulogy at a funeral than you would presenting a new idea to your manager.

  • Active listening

How good are you at giving someone your undivided attention during a conversation? It is important that you genuinely listen to what others are saying and show engagement with verbal and non-verbal responses ( such as nodding, eye contact, facial expressions, and posture). You must also pay attention to the other person’s non-verbal cues and body language.

Non-verbal communication, like your body language, can say just as much as your words, if not more. Examples of open body language include nodding, eye contact, smiling, and a relaxed posture. Crossed arms, restless behavior, and shifting eyes are examples of closed body language.

Here are some steps to help you get started:

  1. Figure out what you need to improve.
  2. Observe others.
  3. Learn control over your emotions.
  4. Think back on previous social interactions.
  5. Practice your skills.
  6. Get constructive feedback from others.

Assessing and improving your interpersonal communication skills can have a wealth of benefits for you. It can help you to build strong relationships, have efficient teamwork, build good morale, etc.

Interpersonal Communication in the Workplace

Interpersonal communication skills in the workplace

How well do you communicate with others in the workplace? Developing your interpersonal communication in the workplace can be vital for your career success. There is a continuous flow of communication in any business setting, both non-verbally and verbally, in person and online. When employees can not effectively manage this flow of communication, it will be detrimental to the productivity of business processes.

Interpersonal Communication and Remote Work

In the modern era, the evolution of communication methods has significantly impacted workplace dynamics. Digital platforms now play an important role in facilitating employee interactions and achieving business objectives. It’s essential for companies to prioritize effective communication in the workplace, especially in remote work scenarios, to ensure uninterrupted workflow and foster resilience in the face of change.

The Components of Interpersonal Communication

To fully develop good communication skills within an organization, you must understand the different components of communication.

  1. Communicators: Both the sender and the receiver of a message are seen as communicators, and each interaction must have at least two communicators.
  2. Message: The message can be conveyed verbally or nonverbally, depending on the situation. You can convey a message through speech, body language, tone of voice, gestures, eye contact, facial expressions, etc. Verbal messages can go hand-in-hand with non-verbal communication that adds more context, and shows deception, interest, and confidence (or lack thereof).
  3. Noise: This refers to barriers that can impede or distort the message that the sender is trying to convey. This includes things like Jargon, language barriers, interruptions, literal noise, inattention, etc.
  4. Feedback: This is the response that the receiver gives to the original message. This creates a two-way flow of communication, allowing the sender to know that the receiver understands the message.
  5. Context: There are many different contexts in which communication can occur, such as the environmental, political, cultural, social, and emotional contexts. The context of the conversation dramatically impacts the expected tone and direction of the communication.
  6. Channel: How is this message being communicated? The medium that is used for communication is just as important as the context. This can be in person, in writing, online, etc.

How to Improve Interpersonal Communication in the Workplace

Employees are becoming more aware of the importance of having good interpersonal skills as the business climate continues to change amid the pandemic. Although communication skills can be challenging to measure, you can develop them through practice and active listening.

Here are some tips on improving communication in the workplace:

  1. Do your research: To optimize interpersonal communication and foster meaningful conversations, it’s essential to gather pertinent facts beforehand and clarify your communication objectives. Prior to meetings or drafting emails, take time to outline what you wish to convey and ensure clarity in your interactions. This preparation enhances the effectiveness of your communication efforts and facilitates productive exchanges.
  2. Consider who you will be talking to: To excel in interpersonal communication, gather insights and prepare thoroughly for upcoming conversations. Prioritize clarity by defining your message before meetings or crafting emails. Take into account the personalities and perspectives of others involved, adjusting your approach accordingly. Choose the appropriate timing and method of communication to ensure effectiveness; some discussions may benefit from face-to-face interactions, while others can be effectively conducted via email. Tailoring your communication style to each situation enhances engagement and understanding.
  3. Evaluate your strengths and weaknesses: Self-evaluation can be very useful when developing soft skills such as social skills and people skills. You can also ask for constructive feedback from coworkers and managers as a learning opportunity for future interactions.
  4. Stay focused and steer clear of interruptions: To maintain focus and minimize interruptions, it’s important to first identify your goals and priorities. Creating a dedicated and distraction-free work environment can help you concentrate better. Set boundaries and communicate expectations to others to ensure uninterrupted workflow. When interruptions do occur, handle them efficiently and get back on track promptly.

Streamline your work and solve problems to facilitate conflict resolution by conveying important information to team members and managers through developing strong interpersonal communication skills in the workplace with our Breakthrough Point Assessment Workshop.

What Are Interpersonal Communication Skills and Why Do They Matter?

What Are Interpersonal Communication Skills and Why Do They Matter_

Interpersonal communication skills are the behaviours that we exhibit when we are interacting with others around us. Whether we are trying to maintain relationships in our personal or professional lives, good interpersonal communication skills are crucial. These skills can help us effectively interact with those around us to build commonalities, create understanding, and ensure good teamwork.

Why Are Good Interpersonal Communication Skills So Important?

Interpersonal communication skills can help you build and maintain relationships with others while developing and growing as a person. Within a workplace, communication excels between individuals with good connections. Here are some vital advantages of good interpersonal skills:

Builds team dynamic and spirit.

When team members can communicate effectively, they can build a healthy dynamic with effective and time-efficient back-and-forth interactions. This ability reinforces honesty, integrity and trust between team members. This, in turn, promotes a friendly and cooperative environment for employees, which will create a sense of belonging and morale.

Sets you apart

Professionals can stay ahead of the competition by combining good technical and professional skills with good communication skills. Building successful, stable, and long-lasting interpersonal connections requires the capacity to communicate effectively with colleagues, employees, and customers. When you can communicate effectively, it will also set you apart from team members who will view you as someone who has good people skills and is charismatic and likeable.

Strengthens communication.

These skills can help collaboration with others, provide guidance, support and reassurance, and convey information effectively. Understanding these skills will also enable you to read a room, understand how your actions affect others, and help you fully grasp what others are trying to tell you. Not only can clear communication of goals and agendas help project output, but it also boosts professionalism and team morale and accelerates conflict resolution.

What Are The Most Important Interpersonal Communication Skills?

Verbal communication skills

  • Oral communication

This is any communication that occurs when we are speaking. Your choice of words, tone of voice, speaking pace and volume can all contribute to the message you are conveying. This is the type of communication that is used the most in everyday life. Effective oral communication can also be beneficial in the workplace as it can help you become more likeable, relatable and credible.

Nonverbal communication skills

Written communication includes all forms of communication that take place using writing or typing. In the workplace, most written communication takes place on the computer, i.e., emails, memos, notes or documents. Word choice isn’t the only thing that conveys meaning in written communication, as emojis, symbols, and punctuation can also say a lot about the message you are trying to send. This type of communication is especially important for remote working environments. If your writing does not convey the correct message or has too many grammatical errors, it can be detrimental to your reputation and work life.

When you speak, do you use many hand gestures? What about your facial expressions, posture and eye contact? All of these things can convey a message to others. When your behaviour and actions line up, it increases your credibility and helps others develop a positive attitude towards you. Reading the body language of others can also help you understand the meaning behind the words of others.

Active listening

Along with effectively communicating your message, it is vital that you can effectively interpret the message of others. By listening to what others are saying, you can respond appropriately with verbal and nonverbal cues, thereby showing empathy and understanding. If others feel like you are actively paying attention and listening to them, they will have a positive experience and enjoy interacting with you. Show others that you are listening by using both verbal and nonverbal cues such as nodding your head, asking questions and responding appropriately.

How Can You Improve Your Interpersonal Communication Skills?

The only way to master strong interpersonal skills is through consistent practice and improvement. These skills may come easy to some, but it might take a bit more conscious effort, patience, and self-awareness for others. By knowing what interpersonal communication is and researching these important skills, you can build your skills and become a more effective communicator in no time.

Improve Your Written Communication Skills and Interpersonal Communication

Written Communication Skills and Interpersonal Communication

Most people will require good written communication skills for their professional life. This is because many business interactions take place via the internet, notes, memos, and letters. For a business to be successful, its employees must harness all types of interpersonal communication skills, including written communication.

What are the different written communication skills used in the workplace?

Analysis

Strong analytical and research skills are essential for conveying fresh ideas and convincing coworkers and senior management to accept them. When you have good analytical skills, you can objectively analyze messages and solve problems. This will help you write responses, memos, and documents objectively to convey messages properly to coworkers and clients. When we harness analytical skills in writing, we can eliminate ambiguity and streamline processes and improve productivity.

Computer and technical literacy

These skills are crucial in the corporate environment, as most written communications and data analysis occurs on a computer. Having adequate computer literacy makes everyday tasks much more manageable and improves efficient communication among employees in different departments. Employees can utilize technology to their advantage when receiving messages and writing practical, well-formatted pieces of work and correspondence.

Professionalism

Having professionalism is vital in all aspects of doing business. There is usually a standard of language used for business correspondence, and spelling mistakes and grammatical errors are unacceptable. Through written correspondence, maintaining a professional appearance will help you have a good, credible reputation in the workplace. Peers and clients will feel confident in doing business with you as they view you as a credible, professional individual with strong interpersonal skills and social skills.

How to improve your written communication skills.

If you are looking to improve your writing skills, it can have many benefits, especially in the workplace. Having sufficient writing skills will help you show competence, understanding, and credibility while showcasing efficiency in decision-making, problem-solving and understanding tasks and correspondence. Here are some great ways to improve your written communication skills:

Practice regularly

The best way to improve your writing skills is to write daily. Most people don’t even realize how little they write every day; that is why it’s important to find a reason to write every day deliberately. Journaling and blogging are great ways to write every day; when you see something interesting, you can write it down in your journal or blog. Or you can write about your dreams, ideas and experiences, whatever inspires you to write regularly. Remember to read through your writing and do some editing. The more you write, the more you will improve.

Ask for advice

Don’t be afraid to ask for the perspective of others. Ask someone you trust to read through your writing and check your spelling, grammar and punctuation. Make sure that you take all criticism positively and use it as a way to improve and grow.  Remember that not all feedback will be positive, but it will give you a good idea of which areas you can work on.

Read different types of books

Reading is a good way to expand your vocabulary and understanding of how words are used. There are many different resources that you can read to learn different things, but when you are just starting, any book will help. A simple fiction book or novel will already allow you to expand your skills, but it will also be beneficial to read books on grammar. There are many how-to books that can help you to master the English language. 

Writing is one of the most essential types of non-verbal communication, and you must have a positive attitude and stay patient while practising it. Just like any other skill, writing does not need to be mastered over time. With consistent effort, you will be able to add your impressive writing to your list of successful interpersonal communication skills.

Active listening – A successful communication skill

Active listening - A successful communication skill

Listening should be an active process with which to gain information,  understand, and learn.  How well you listen will have a significant impact on your ability to understand and have relationships with others. When trying to be an effective communicator, you must give your undivided attention while listening; this is a skill that must actively be improved to better your interpersonal communication skills.

What is Active Listening?

Different people have varying listening abilities, but we can improve our active listening skills by practising active listening. Active listening happens when you consciously concentrate on what others are saying instead of just using passive listening. When you listen actively, it can act as a reflection of interest through both verbal and non-verbal messages, e.g. nods, saying yes, making eye contact, etc. When you show interest, it helps to keep a conversation engaging, causing participants to be more open and honest.

Why is active listening important in the workplace?

For an organization to be successful, employees need to maintain effective communication. There are many advantages of active listening, such as:

  • Build trust. When your words match your actions and you have mastered effective listening, it builds a feeling of mutual trust between professionals. Employees can better convey information, assign tasks and report back frequently. Without trust, communication will fall behind, and work performance will suffer.
  • Increase productivity. Being able to communicate will reduce misunderstandings, and work will be completed more effectively. Proper feedback while considering the views of others will also make them feel heard and respected, making for a healthy workplace.
  • Resolve conflict. Misunderstandings can lead to conflict, but this can be resolved using good communication and critical listening. To do this, you must be able to keep an open mind and use communication and active listening techniques to see things from others’ perspectives.
  • Promote self-empowerment. When individuals feel heard, it encourages them to speak their minds, listen and be open-minded towards colleagues—having this added confidence, your company can build awareness and respect.
  • Improves acceptance of employees. Each company has its own unique culture, and for a business to be successful, all employees must be accepted within this culture and feel accepted.  When all employees can listen actively and show respect, it fosters acceptance and belonging under employees.

Signs of Active Listening

There are multiple verbal and non-verbal cues that someone is actively listening to what others are saying. When you are engaging in a conversation, you can tell if someone is listening by paying attention to these signs (or a lack thereof):

Verbal Cues of Active Listening

  • Positively reinforcing the message of the speaker with words of encouragement or understanding.
  • Remembering, paraphrasing, and repeating details or focus points of the conversation and expanding on them with their own ideas and perspectives.
  • Asking for clarification by asking specific questions or making sure that the correct message was received.
  • Summarising the main points of the speaker’s message and repeating them to ensure mutual understanding.

Non-verbal Cues of Active Listening

  • Body language like smiling in agreement, often giving nods of the head as a way of confirmation, etc.
  • Making and maintaining eye contact in combination with other non-verbal behaviors.
  • Posture leaning forward, sideways, a slight tilt of their head etc.
  • Focus, a skilful listener will not get distracted, fidget or look around.
  • Mirroring the speaker’s actions or facial expressions to show sympathy and empathy.

Active listening is a beneficial (if not necessary) skill for everyday life, in and out of the workplace. Although acquiring this skill and picking up on verbal and non-verbal signals can be more challenging for some individuals and may require lots of patience, it can be achievable for anyone willing to put in the conscious effort.

A guide to body language in interpersonal communication

When you communicate, you use more than just your voice; in fact, a big part of the information you convey is through non-verbal communication – Body language. We’ve all heard of body language and have a basic understanding of what it is, but how can you interpret and use body language in your everyday conversations with other people? This article will act as a guide to help you in understanding body language and how we can use it in our daily life:

What is body language?

Your body can reveal a lot about your true feelings, intentions and mood during a conversation. Whether you are aware of it or not, your mannerisms, behaviour, gestures and facial expressions can mirror exactly what you are feeling. Understanding body language and interpreting it can help you determine the true feelings and intentions of others during a conversation.

How Do We Communicate Through Body Language?

There are many different ways in which we communicate through body language. To effectively develop your interpersonal skills, it is important to understand these types of non-verbal communication and what they can reveal to others.

  • Eye contact – How do you look at someone? How do you hold eye contact? How often do you blink? These non-verbal behaviours can reveal many emotions such as anger, sadness, excitement, boredom, fear and stress. Maintaining direct eye contact also tells the other person that you are still paying attention.
  • Body movement and gestures – You can tell a lot about someone from how they stand, sit, slouch, move their hands or feet. Body movement, gestures and posture can communicate so many different things during a conversation. For instance, when people use excessive hand gestures while arguing, it can reveal the level of their hostility, anger or nervousness.
  • Facial expressions – Normally, this nonverbal signal is spontaneous and natural; arching your eyebrows, widening your eyes or pursing your lips can tell a lot about how you feel. Many people can not control their facial expressions when they experience emotions such as shock, excitement or fear. Facial expressions are also one of the few forms of communication that is the same across most different cultures and are therefore universally understood.
  • Touch and space – Physical contact can say a lot about your intentions and feelings. For example, a weak handshake can reveal to others that you lack confidence, whereas a tight grip of someone’s upper arm may reveal hostility or danger. In the same way, your proximity to someone may also tell many things during a conversation. If you are comfortable with someone, you might sit closely next to them, but you might feel naturally inclined to increase the social distance between you when you feel threatened.
  • Tone of voice – How you speak is also important if you want to send the right message to others. When giving condolences, it would be inappropriate to talk loud and cheerfully, for example. Your tone and inflection must match the content of your message. Your tone of voice might also differ according to the social setting you are in, e.g. a funeral vs. the workplace. When speaking to colleagues, you might want to show professionalism, while you want to show empathy when talking to family members at a funeral. Knowing when to adjust your tone can require a lot of emotional intelligence.

The importance of body language and nonverbal communication

In some instances, what you say and communicate through your body language can be two different things. If your body language and words do not match, it can cause the listener to suspect that you are deceitful. However, if you have a good understanding of non-verbal communication, you can ensure that your spoken words match your actions, and consequently, you can build trust and strong connections with others.

Mastering your non-verbal communication skills requires full focus and understanding of the rapid back-and-forth flow of interpersonal communication. Understanding body language can help you develop a higher level of emotional awareness and become a more effective communicator. It is essential to remain present during a conversation, interpret non-verbal cues from others, and stay aware of your own actions during any social interaction.

The Role of Eye Contact in Communication

A professional teaching the importance of eye contact in communication.

Making eye contact in communication is one of the best ways to show someone that you care about what they are saying.  Your eyes can also convey a wide range of other information and emotions without you even realizing it.  However, making eye contact isn’t necessarily a skill that comes naturally to everyone, and knowing what the appropriate amount of eye contact is can be challenging.

Using the appropriate amount of eye contact can help you to show interest, attentiveness and concern. In contrast, too much eye contact may be inappropriate and creepy, and a lack of eye contact can seem disinterested, inattentive and rude. There are many ways in which mastering the art of eye contact can help you with non-verbal communication, both in the workplace and out in the world.

Importance of Eye Contact In Communication

There are several reasons why eye contact can play a vital role in effective interpersonal communication.  Understanding how appropriate eye contact can influence communication is very important for self-awareness and personal growth. Here are a few reasons why eye contact can be so important:

  • It shows respect – In the Western culture, eye contact can be a crucial way that individuals show each other respect. This might not be the only way to show respect, but by looking someone in the eye during an interaction, we acknowledge that we regard them as equals in importance.
  • It shows that you are still following the conversation – By locking eyes with someone, it can be a sure-fire indicator that you still understand and are paying attention to what they are saying. By maintaining eye contact and giving regular feedback, you will ensure a successful verbal exchange with others.
  • It helps us bond with one another – There are certain neurons within the human brain that are highly sensitive to facial expressions and eye contact. This means that eye contact can act as a tool for establishing intimacy, empathy, linking emotional states and creating bonds between humans.
  • It helps us to see the true feelings and thoughts of others – Although eye contact can indeed reveal our innermost thoughts to others, the opposite is also true. By making eye contact with someone, we might be able to learn more about them. From someone’s eyes, you might be able to tell shyness, sadness, disgust or even affection.
  • It helps us convey confidence – When we are confident, we have little problem maintaining eye contact, whereas it is more difficult to look others in the eye when we lack self-confidence or when we are nervous. Maintaining eye contact can therefore show assertiveness and help us seem more confident and self-assured, especially within a professional context.

Overcoming Challenges with Eye Contact

While eye contact offers numerous benefits, many individuals may encounter challenges in its practice. Addressing and overcoming these hurdles can lead to improved communication and greater interpersonal success. Here are some common challenges and strategies to address them:

Overcoming Shyness: Shy individuals may find it challenging to maintain prolonged eye contact. Gradual exposure to eye contact in safe and comfortable environments, along with building self-confidence, can help them become more at ease with this aspect of communication.

Managing Cultural Variations: Different cultures have distinct norms regarding eye contact. Educating oneself about cultural differences and adapting one’s eye contact practices accordingly is essential to demonstrate respect and understanding in cross-cultural interactions.

Reducing Intimidation: Intense or prolonged eye contact may be perceived as intimidating or aggressive. Striking a balance between assertiveness and approachability is key to creating a positive and receptive communication atmosphere.

Addressing Eye Contact Avoidance: Some individuals may avoid eye contact due to anxiety or discomfort. Identifying the underlying reasons for this avoidance and seeking support or professional guidance can help in addressing and overcoming the issue.

Practicing Moderation: While eye contact is essential, excessive or constant eye contact can be overwhelming. Practicing moderation and adapting eye contact based on the context and comfort level of the individuals involved ensures that interactions remain comfortable and respectful.

The Messages Our Eyes Convey in Communication

Winking, staring, and rolling your eyes, certain eye movements and behaviours have a generally known meaning. There are, however, other messages that we can convey with our eyes without even knowing it, and not all of them are necessarily positive. Here are some examples of messages that eyes might be giving:

  • Looking to the left – It is said that when a speaker breaks their gaze and looks left, they are trying to recollect information, while looking left and straight signifies an internal self-conversation before continuing the discussion.
  • Looking to the right – This can convey self-doubt or deceit from a speaker. Looking to the right might signify someone tapping into their imagination, whereas looking to the left might indicate that someone is activating their memories.
  • Direct eye contact – When a speaker maintains eye contact, it indicates that they are truthful. Listeners who keep eye contact come forth as attentive and interested.
  • Blinking frequently – This could indicate that the participants in a conversation are either very excited or excessively bored. To evaluate the meaning behind this cue, it might be necessary to analyze other non-verbal signals, such as gestures, posture, tension, etc.
  • Rubbing your eyes – The most common reason someone might be rubbing their eyes is tiredness, but this can also indicate frustration and iritation. Again it is essential to look at other non-verbal cues to analyze the meaning behind this behaviour.

The significance of eye contact in communication lies in decoding non-verbal cues, and revealing others’ true emotions and intentions. Paying attention to the eye movements and other non-verbal behaviours that you and others might display is the best way to understand the true feelings and intentions of others. Knowing what signals you send with your eyes can also help you develop your interpersonal communication skills, which may benefit you in all aspects of your everyday life. Learn the transformative potential of eye contact in communication and embrace its profound influence on every aspect of your personal and professional life.

 

Key Interpersonal Communication Skills you need to Improve

What are interpersonal communication skills

Interpersonal communication skills are the abilities we need to communicate effectively, both verbally and non-verbally. Possessing these skills can help us to work well with others and interact effectively with others out in the world. These skills can be greatly valued in a work environment as they can help lead a business to higher success rates. Employees with pleasant demeanours and practical communication abilities are therefore more likely to do well in the workplace. They do better with teamwork, constructive feedback and within team-building situations.

These skills depend on a person’s ability to pick up on and interpret signals from other people to adequately and appropriately respond. They may be more developed in some people than others and can depend greatly on the personality type of certain individuals. To learn more about strong interpersonal skills, however, it is vital to first understand the concept of interpersonal communication.

What is Interpersonal Communication?

Interpersonal communication is the act of sharing information such as thoughts, emotions, and ideas verbally and non-verbally between people. By effectively sharing information, we can better understand and interact with others, both professionally and personally. With the digital age upon us and with so many different channels of communication available, it is becoming increasingly important for individuals to harness and develop how they communicate.

Elements of Interpersonal Communication

There are a few elements that play a role in effective interpersonal communication. These elements have been the subject of many research studies and can be broken down into the following categories:

  • Communicators – It goes without saying that any conversation needs at least two participants. Within this verbal transaction, there is always a sender and a receiver. However, these roles often switch between individuals as the conversation progresses because of the need for back and forth communication. There is, therefore, more than one communicator that will both receive and send messages in an interactive exchange.
  • The Message – This is more than just the information conveyed throughout a conversation. Things like non-verbal cues, posture, direct eye contact, gestures, facial expressions and body language can also contribute to the message received during communication. Non-verbal signals can be just as important to a message as spoken words, as they can convey our true feelings. For example, it is more challenging to hide emotions such as tension, sadness, disgust or affection with non-verbal behaviours as body language can reveal more than we think. The message that is then given as a response is known as feedback.
  • Noise – This can be defined as anything that can distort the message. With interpersonal communication, this includes physical noise but can also include disinterest, lack of eye contact or attention, complicated words, cultural differences and misunderstanding.
  • Channel – This refers to the means of communication, how it is transmitted. Communication can be face-to-face, telephonic, written. Different channels of communication rely on different verbal and non-verbal elements. For example, a telephone conversation is not reliant on body language but relies mainly on speech, whereas face-to-face conversations also rely on non-verbal communicators.
  • Context – The context in which communication takes place is very important for successful interpersonal communication. When a conversation takes place in a social setting, it requires different situational skills than a conversation in an office.

Why you should practice your interpersonal communication skills.

Even though some people may be born with the ability to use such skills effectively, there are many people to whom this ability does not come naturally. Of course, these are skills that can be learned and improved through practice. Here are some workplace benefits of developing your interpersonal communication skills:

  • Build your credibility and trustworthiness.
  • Build better relationships with team members.
  • Develop people skills, reduce misunderstandings and gain job satisfaction.
  • Enhanced problem-solving, negotiation and conflict management skills.
  • Battle shyness to improve confidence and assertiveness.

It is important to remain aware of your ability to communicate with those around you effectively. By practising self-awareness, you will be able to identify any problem points you may experience with interpersonal communication, allowing you to focus on development and self-growth.

Top 4 Interpersonal Communication Skills You Need to Get Ahead at Work

Women and Lady giving each other a High-Five

What are the most important skills to have to get ahead in your career? Some essential skills include increasing your visibility, getting others to perceive you in a positive light, developing your executive presence and having strong interpersonal communication skills.

What are interpersonal skills?

A general definition would be that interpersonal skills are the skills required to effectively communicate both verbally and non-verbally. According to a recent article in Hubpages, Terersa Coppens groups interpersonal skills into four main categories:

Most interpersonal skills can be grouped under one of four main forms of communication: verbal, listening, written and non-verbal communication. Some skills such as recognition of stress and attitude are important to all forms of interpersonal communication. Effective communication skills result in mutual understanding. Poor communication wastes time and resources, get in the way of accomplishing goals and can sour relationships.

Some people may view interpersonal skills as a natural talent that people either have or don’t. But the truth is that they are skills that can easily be learned and developed. One of the best ways to improve any skill is through active and continuous practice. There are several ways in which all 4 types of interpersonal communication can be improved upon and several reasons why you may want to.

What are the 4 types of interpersonal communication skills?

Lady Sitting on a couch

Listening skills (possibly the most important of all communication skills) and verbal skills include:

  • Relaxation – a calm, self-confident manner allows for more coherent verbal expression and gives the impression of an active listener.
  • Positive attitude – all people prefer communicating with the happy, accepting person.
  • Empathy – by seeing, understanding and respecting another’s point of view, a person gains respect and the trust of others as a speaker and is seen as an attentive listener.
  • Understanding stress in yourself and others – allows for self-monitoring of your own verbal communication and a greater understanding of a speaker’s motivations; you realize when your tone of voice or word choice is affected by internal feelings of stress and as well understand when you are listening to someone who’s speech is affected by stress; it allows you to compensate accordingly.
  • Assertiveness – this quality is essential and fundamental to negotiation in that the participants express beliefs in a way others can understand but also respect the thoughts and feelings of all involved
  • Teamwork – includes adaptability and flexibility in dealing with differing personalities and differing interpersonal skill levels.

interpersonal communication skills

Active listening – A successful communication skill

When listening to someone speaking, you can simply passively hear their message or actively listen to understand, learn, and respond. When learning how to listen to others actively, you can learn more about different people’s insights, perspectives, and experiences.

Using active listening in the workplace can accelerate growth personally and professionally because it facilitates learning from others and considering new ideas. This is undoubtedly one of the most vital skills that can be developed for personal growth. Since listening is one-half of effective communication exchange, it is almost impossible to communicate at all without it.

When we listen actively, we can respond effectively to ensure a beneficial. That is why listening with focus and effort can be critical while remaining as involved in the discussion as the speaker. Sharpening your listening skills can be an essential part of developing effective interpersonal communication skills. Here are a few tips to help you build your active listening:

  • Focus on the conversation at hand. Try not to multitask but give the speaker your undivided attention.
  • Don’t interrupt the speaker. Interrupting someone might give off the impression that you don’t find what they are saying very important.
  • Don’t jump to conclusions. Have patience and allow people to get to the point on their own time and do not try to finish their points for them,
  • Ask questions. This shows that you are interested and would like clarity and context.

Written Communication Skills and Interpersonal Communication

Nearly all jobs will require you to write something at some point. Effective written communication can be a make or break for effectively conveying a message to someone else. The ability to write clearly and concisely ensures that everyone you communicate with will understand the message that you are trying to give.

Written communication can share many of the same attributes as verbal communication, good sentence construction and word choice play a vital role in this type of communication, just as with verbal communication. There are, however, a few differences between written and oral communication. Where verbal communication relies greatly on body language, tone of voice and eye contact for added context clues, written communication must convey a message effectively without any of these.

To develop effective written communication, it is crucial to focus on skills that help you gain greater attention to detail and understanding of grammar, punctuation and word choice.

Written skills include:

  • Analysis – strong analytical and research skills are key in expressing new ideas and getting them accepted by co-workers and senior management.
  • Computer and technical literacy – these skills are essential in the business world as most written communication and all analysis of data occurs on the computer.
  • Professionalism – this quality is important in all forms of interpersonal communication techniques including written communication; standard formats for business correspondence are common, and spelling mistakes and grammatical errors are unacceptable, eroding a worker’s value in the firm

Non-verbal interpersonal skills include:

  • Body language
  • Eye-contact
  • Micro-facial expressions

Eye contact: Its role in interpersonal communication

Eye contact is one of the best-known aspects of non-verbal communication. From eye contact or a lack thereof, it is possible to tell a lot about someone and their intentions. When someone can establish good eye contact, they are perceived as trustworthy and confident, at least according to western culture.

When someone subsequently fails to maintain eye contact, they are perceived as less credible or reliable when they look down or if their eyes constantly stray. That being said, there is also a more refined nuance when it comes to breaks of gaze. When expressing condolences, a drop of gaze might portray genuine sympathy or compassion. A drop in gaze may also display guilt or remorse when someone is being questioned.

Similarly, there are many different ways in which eye contact can be very revealing during a conversation. For example, an active listener will most likely focus their gaze on the speaker’s lips when conversing. If the listener breaks this gaze and makes eye contact with the speaker, it can be seen as a non-verbal cue that they would like to interject or say something.

Understanding these subtle nuances of non-verbal communication through eye contact can help you gain more context clues from the conversation and seem more credible and confident during discussions with others.

Body language in interpersonal communication

Body language is what you are saying when you aren’t saying anything. Often, your body language can speak the loudest when you are engaged in conversation with others. Your facial expressions, gestures, posture and tone of voice can reveal a lot about how you are feeling within a conversation.

Non-verbal cues, portrayed in the way you listen, look, move and react are essential in showing other participants in a conversation that you care, are trustworthy and that you are actively listening. Body language gets picked up subconsciously by others. When faced with believing your verbal message or the message portrayed by your body language, most people will feel inclined to judge you by your body language.

Body language is often instinctive and not conscious, which is why it can be a very good indicator of a person’s true feelings and intent. Most of us are constantly analyzing each other’s body language without even realizing it, which is why it can be very beneficial to be aware of your body and the messages you are conveying with it during conversations.

In his pioneering fieldwork, Professor Mehrabian made two key points:

  1. a) There are 3 elements in face-to-face communications, often called the “3-Vs:”
  • Verbal, or words
  • Vocal, or tone of voice
  • Visual, meaning non-verbal behaviours or Body Language
  1. b) Visual components communicate far more than verbal – in situations where the words are not compatible with the non-verbal signals – and people tend to believe the behaviour and the tone of voice, not the verbal message.

Interpersonal Communication

According to Professor Mehrabian, we evaluate the 3-Vs quite differently. His findings are often called the 7%-38%-55% rule or the Mehrabian formula:

  • 7% Verbal
  • 38% Vocal
  • 55% Visual

His formula was refined under research conditions where there was incompatibility, or incongruence, between words and facial expressions when communicating feelings and attitudes.

Why do interpersonal communication skills matter?

All of the above can reinforce the honesty, integrity and trust of personal interaction with co-workers and clients. In verbal exchanges, a person lacking eye contact is seen as dishonest and/ or lacking confidence in their words. Reliability and responsibility are also conveyed by positive gestures and body language that match the tone and content of the speaker’s voice. Excessive hand gestures and invasion of another’s personal space are intimidating and detracts from the value of the conversation. Leaders with poor non-verbal communication skills are not viewed as effective and leading to lower productivity and poor office morale.

Having good technical and professional skills paired with good communication skills can help professionals stay ahead of the competition. Having the ability to communicate effectively with co-workers, employees and customers can be very beneficial in building effective, solid and lasting interpersonal relationships.

These skills can help collaboration with others, provide guidance, support and reassurance, and convey information effectively. Understanding these skills will also enable you to read a room, understand how your actions affect others, and help you fully grasp what others are trying to tell you.

Interpersonal communication skills in the workplace

While it is imperative that employees possess the technical abilities to fulfill their duties, a well-functioning, effective team highly relies on each team member being able to communicate and highlight concerns with their peers. Technical skills are the hard skills needed to complete tasks, whereas people skills are the soft skills necessary for interpersonal communication and understanding.

A lack of interpersonal skills in a work environment can lead to many issues within the workflow and satisfaction within teams. Lack of communication can easily lead to frustration, disconnect and lowered morale and productivity. The team may not feel that they can function as a team. Communication can also be vital in ensuring that clients do not feel neglected or forgotten. This is why all employees must be able to communicate, provide feedback and listen to concerns.

Improved interpersonal communication in the workplace can be crucial to business success. It falls upon all employers and employees to develop self-awareness of their own interpersonal skills and work on the areas where they might be lacking. A business might be able to motivate its employees to strengthen their communication through incentives and training.

How to assess your own interpersonal communication skills

When assessing your interpersonal skills, many online tools and questionnaires may help you analyze how effectively you communicate with others. Knowing how to discern between effective and ineffective interpersonal skills can be very important as these skills can be the hardest to self-analyze. One way to assess your interpersonal skills is to evaluate all of the aspects of interpersonal communication individually and to determine how effectively you can master each.

Businesses can assess the interpersonal skills of their employees using tests, reports such as reference letters or peer feedback, and conversations with each employee. Employees might even be asked to evaluate each other on several aspects of interpersonal communication. Written and listening skills can be evaluated using comprehension and writing tests.

Although these assessments can be valuable in identifying employees that could benefit from interpersonal skills training, it is important to note that they can be indicative of previous performance and behaviour and might not be an accurate reflection of future performance. Therefore it may also be beneficial to observe employees outside of these assessments to see how they perform on a daily basis.

5 tips to improve your interpersonal communication skills

Developing strong interpersonal skills can be beneficial for both your professional and personal life.  There are many different ways in which these skills can be improved and perfected with some effort and dedication. Here are 5 tips to help you if you are looking to improve your interpersonal communication skills:

  • Practice maintaining appropriate eye contact – Actively work on giving attention to others during conversations to portray interest, validation and focus. This will also help you to avoid distractions around you.
  • Be truthful – Many times, people can be very intuitive, and it is surprisingly easy to pick up on defeat. Being honest with others will strengthen your relationships and maintain your reputation and integrity.
  • Become more aware of your gestures and posture during conversations – No matter how subtle your gestures may be, they can say a lot about you. For example, try not to cross your arms or slouch as this may show disinterest or boredom.
  • Stay positive – If you appear happy and optimistic, others will be more open to speaking with you as you appear non-judgemental, welcoming and accepting. Focus on how things can improve and develop instead of focussing on the negatives.
  • Read more – Reading will help you to grow your vocabulary and become more articulate. Being aware of global news, scientific developments and general knowledge will also help you communicate more effectively. Reading will also help you to improve your writing skills.

Reflect on your personal development regularly to continuously improve and learn. Be open to opportunities that might help you grow and understand the intricacies of interpersonal, verbal and non-verbal communication. It goes without saying that interpersonal communication skills are essential in any career or business as person-to-person interaction is required at any level and for virtually any job. Build key interpersonal communication skills by developing executive presence.

Master your leadership, social and interpersonal skills with CCI’s Online Self-Paced Leadership Presence System!

leadership presence training program

5 Virtual Meetings Best Practices for Zoom and Other Social Platforms

Amid a global pandemic, we are striving to get results without being able to meet face-to-face.  We need to lead our teams, but we need to do it screen-to-screen.  There are several platforms available, all which do a great job at enabling the screen-to-screen experience.  Granted, but why is it so much more difficult than running a face-to-face meeting? 

At the best of times, most of us are anxious speakers. 

Our shyness, nerves and anxiety revolve around what to say and how to say it.  Those feelings do not just go away when we meet with others virtually.  Our discomfort grows when we add to that the ‘newness’ of these virtual platforms, the limitations of internet bandwidth and the discomfort with always being on screen. 

A few months ago, we were used to letting our mind wander while watching TV.  Now, it’s watching us!  A further complication is interpreting facial expressions when participating in a screen-to-screen meeting. 

Micro-facial expressions are essential to our understanding of one another.

On screen, facial expressions all but disappear, are distorted or frozen for a moment due to internet connectivity.  Eye contact, so critical in face-to-face communication is difficult to achieve on screen.  It is hard to know where to look. 

As a default, we tend to look at ourselves (yikes).   

Some of us are exhausted with screen-to-screen meetings.  It seems that all our social interaction is on screen.  Our job, family, club, church, and even our doctor all occurs at home, on screen. 

What has not changed for leaders, is the need to plan, manage and facilitate our team meetings. 

Importantly, we need to engage our meeting participants.  That said, many of us were not always successful engaging our teams when we met face-to-face.  Screen-to-screen meetings just exacerbates the problem.  

Here are 5 important virtual meetings best practices for zoom and other social platforms:

Clothing

Dressing appropriately, contributes to your presence, where dressing inappropriately takes away from it. 

The rule is to dress for your audience.  If your office dress code is business casual, then dress that way for your virtual meetings.  

Here are some additional guidelines to keep in mind when on camera:

  • Avoid bright coloured clothing and accessories; they tend to reflect light and are too vivid on camera.  Instead, wear a blue, gray, pink, or beige shirt/blouse
  • Avoid black suits/jackets which tend to diminish your appearance because they absorb too much light.  Instead, wear a medium colored suit, best bets are blue/dark blue, gray, and brown
  • Avoid fabrics with complicated patterns such as checks, tight/close stripes, herringbones, tweeds, and loud plaids. Fabrics of this design tend to strobe and or flutter on camera which can be distracting
  • Wear clothes made of natural fabrics that tend to breathe easily under the warm studio lights. This allows you to remain feeling cool and comfortable
  • Avoid shiny jewelry that may sparkle, or any jewelry that rattles and may cause a distracting noise
  • Style your hair off your face to avoid shadows. A clearer view of your face allows the audience to see your expressions and connect with you more when you speak

Lighting

Merriam Webster dictionary defines “in the best light” as – “in a way that makes someone, or something appear in the best way.”  This is especially true when you participate in a screen-to-screen meeting.  Many people do not consider proper lighting at all, and it shows.  Regrettably, it reflects on their ‘presence’ as well.

The good news is you don’t have to invest $100’s in Hollywood lighting to show up “in the best light.”  Ambient light can do the trick.  Face a window if you have one in your workspace.  If that does not produce the desired effect, consider augmenting your space with additional lighting. 

Sound

It always makes great sense to procure a USB microphone or a USB computer headset with microphone for your virtual meetings to eliminate echo and reduce sound distortion.

Background

If you are going to use your natural environment for background, ensure it is neat and any distracting objects are removed.  Some web-based meeting platforms like ZOOM provide virtual backgrounds that you can substitute for your natural background.  If you choose a virtual background, you should consider using a green screen.  It provides stability to the background and eliminates jumpy images.

Your best angle and maintaining eye contact

You want to look your best when you are on camera.  The first step is to locate your web cam and raise your laptop so that your web cam is at your eye level or slightly above.  A virtual meeting needs human connection, and if your video is not relatable, it will be a distraction. Angles that are too low or too high will be distracting. Humanize your meeting by literally leveling with and looking in the eye of the people you’re talking to.  You may have to raise your laptop using boxes or their equivalent.  One more thing: IF you are using two screens, make sure you move the platform screen below your camera otherwise it will look like you are looking at something else in the room.

Finally, establish your on-camera position.  The safest composition for all devices is upper chest level.  Mimic how close you will get in an actual in-person meeting. When you are meeting someone in person, face to face, you don’t get too close or too far away – you just keep enough distance that you can hear each other.   Frame your position using the ‘Rule of Thirds’, a mechanism that photographers use to frame their shots. 

Barry Kuntz
Senior Associate, Corporate Class Inc.