Your company’s online presence is multifunctional: it can serve as a first impression for new or prospective clients; in addition, it keeps your existing partners, clients, shareholders, and any other relevant contacts connected to your business and updated on your current work. And if you want your company’s name known on the web, a website alone is not enough to make a mark. Using several social media platforms for professional promotion will allow you to share more information with a larger and more diverse audience. It will also enable you to actively engage with your users, more so than a website that does not accommodate feedback or posts from readers. Below are a few platforms you can use to maximize your company’s social media presence – with added tips for respectful conduct and content on the web.

Facebook

Even if you already have a personal account on Facebook, start a new page for your company. With a professional Facebook page, not only can you share information on your business and updates via news and photos, but you can also dialogue with your contacts. Users can post on the wall of your page, allowing you to respond directly on their posts. This is a great way to make connections in a more informal setting with business contacts. Also, Facebook pages will accommodate more than one administrator who can edit the page, enabling both you and your colleagues to keep tabs on the site.

Etiquette tip: Generally, Facebook is a casual and social forum – so if you do have a personal account, be sure to keep it distinct from your professional page. On your company page and status updates, don’t write about private life or update personal photos; instead, keep it strictly business-related.

Twitter

Since Twitter is a space for short updates only (each tweet is limited to 140 characters), it works well for sharing brief quotes, related facts, and relevant links. It also acts as a tool to keep your various social media platforms connected and to direct users to your other company pages: for example, you can program most blog sites to automatically tweet when a new article is posted; you can also have your Twitter feed as a sidebar on your website or blog homepage. In addition, dashboards such as HootSuite or Tweet Deck allow you to pre-load tweets and conveniently shrink long links, so that your company Twitter is active and presenting new information, even when you don’t have the time to update regularly.

Etiquette tip: Tweet often, but not constantly. Too many tweets can appear overwhelming and even attention-grabbing, and users may become annoyed when they see unlimited tweets from one source. You don’t want to risk losing followers!

Blogs

Blogs can be customized and designed to fit your company objectives. For example, if your company is visual or design-based, blogs like Tumblr have templates to streamline or arrange images in interesting formats. If your company’s product is content-based, platforms like WordPress or Blogspot can accommodate long texts, either written by you or uploaded from an external source to share. Blogs are one of the best ways to share extended articles or detailed information, and still provide a space for feedback and discussion with readers.

Etiquette tip: If you post content on your blog that is not your own work, be sure to properly cite the article and author, and also provide a link to the original source.

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E-body language

Minding your PDA P’s and Q’s

 

We send and receive dozens of work-related emails every day. Messages – often ones that are internal communications – crowd our inboxes and our time. But how many of those incoming emails are truly necessary and important? When does the amount of spent reading and responding to colleagues’ emails become counter-productive? These questions have surfaced as companies have begun to explore new ways to improve efficiency and to relieve their employees from daily floods of redundant messages. In this post I will discuss one CEO’s sweeping change to internal communication in his company – plus a few small ways that you can improve email techniques among your own colleagues.

Email has become such an indispensible part of internal communication that it is hard to imagine abandoning it entirely. Yet one CEO has done just that: last month, Thierry Breton, the CEO of Atos, an information technology services company, announced the implementation of a company-wide internal ban to begin this year. This is no small feat, as Atos has 80,000 employees spanning 42 countries.

The announcement caused a stir both within the company and from the media, yet Breton strongly defended his decision during an interview with the BBC in December. He explained that the grounds for the internal email ban was to “enhance the quality of working conditions” for all 80,000 employees, who are regularly swamped with emails. Another concern was for the quality of his company, which was spending “too much time on internal emails and not enough time on management.” In addition, external emails will still be a primary form of communication with clients.

What, then, are the alternatives for efficient internal communication, especially within a company where employees span multiple continents and time zones? Breton cited a range of tools that Atos has begun to incorporate and will continue to implement over the coming months, which Breton himself now uses entirely over internal email. The options include instant messaging, internal social networks (such as Yammer, about which you can read more in an earlier blog post), cloud computing, and micro blogging. Among my favourite options are document sharing sites, which cut out email attachments and provide an online forum where colleagues can post comments and questions about documents.

Most companies are not ready to eliminate internal emails. Even Breton predicts it will be 10 to 15 years before all business adopt such methods. Instead, here are a few suggestions on how to trim down your own emails – and feel free to share them with colleagues!

-       Start with a descriptive yet concise subject line. If the subject line clearly states your purpose, it will help you to cut down text in the body of the email.

-       Before you “Reply All” or CC others on the email, consider whether all recipients really need to see the email. It takes a while to read through long email chains and is an inefficient use of time if the conversation is not relevant to the recipient.

-       If you are about to reply to an email with simple “thanks,” reflect first on whom you are sending it to. Some people appreciate a concluding email of gratitude; others find it unnecessary and a waste of time and space.

-       Reread and edit emails before you send them. Work emails should be concise and to the point, and each time you read through you will discover more words to eliminate. This is especially important for emails sent to a mobile device.

If you have a few points to discuss, break down your email into bullet points. This organizes your thoughts in a clear fashion, and your recipient will appreciate reading a few bullet points instead of long-winded paragraphs.

More articles on email etiquette

E-body language

Minding your PDA P’s and Q’s

The job search can be daunting, whether you have just entered the market for the first time or you are seeking a change after years of employment. Finding a new job requires not only persistence and determination, but also a sound set of tools, including your resume, cover letter, interview skills and plan of action. At Corporate Class Inc. we also teach that a well-developed professional image and an understanding of business etiquette contribute significantly to your growth as a professional and to your success in the job market. Because these tools and skills combined are all vital when searching for jobs, we would like to recommend a useful resource that addresses all these components and outlines the process in a comprehensive guide: Narinder K. Mehta’s recently published Five Steps to Your Next Job: A Powerful Manual for Job Search and Career Development.

The strength of Mehta’s guide comes from its relevance to today’s market: Mehta features components of the job search that have always been important, but he has updated them for use in a contemporary context. “Social Media and the Job Search” is a section of the book we found to be particularly strategic as it not only lends advice on how to use popular social media for advancing your career, but also focuses on properly conducting yourself within these sites so as to project the best professional image – two objectives we highlight in our own work at Corporate Class Inc.

As Mehta explains throughout the book, networking is as important in the job search as a strong cover letter and a refined resume. Now, with social media sites that lead to countless avenues of connections, networking has grown significantly in form and dimension. According to Mehta, “your online presence is a crucial component of your resume.” Not only is it becoming more common for potential employers to search candidates online, but also an “online presence” is a beneficial tool for actively making connections with colleagues and professionals in your field of interest.

One suggestion that Mehta offers for establishing yourself professionally online is to start a blog. Once you have a few posts published, it will reveal your writing skills and your ability to sustain a project or a set of ideas. We agree with Mehta’s recommendation to choose one particular theme so that you are not rambling or that your blog is not just an “unstructured journal of your thoughts.” Similarly, it is advantageous to monitor not only any personal information that you publish, but also to keep tabs on the language and content of your posts and any following comments from readers. If a reader leaves a negative comment following a post, always engage in a courteous and brief manner publicly, then follow up with the person in a private message to resolve any issue. Don’t engage in an extended and hostile debate on a site: it will not represent you or your blog well.

Mehta proposes another tip that we find to be very valuable in online networking: creating a LinkedIn account. Mehta touts the importance of making connections with anyone you may know and asking for recommendations from former colleagues so that potential employers can immediately access a professional reference. LinkedIn is certainly one of the best sites for those networking online; Mehta has great insight here on how best to use it. We would also add that while it is very important for you to add all your credentials and professional experience to your profile, be careful of exaggerating your skills: not only could you be caught in an awkward moment if an employer realizes you do not meet your self-described qualifications, but also your former colleagues can read and recognize such amplifications. Be descriptive but realistic.

As Mehta illustrates in this portion of the book, the Internet is now an indispensable part of the job market. There are countless opportunities to search for positions, to make connections with employers, and to reveal your skills and credentials. The key is to know how to portray yourself professionally online and to find the most useful networks in your field; once you have done so, you are on your way to advancing your career.

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Leadership is a skill that is not reserved solely for managers, directors, VPs, or anyone else who is the head of a department or a company. It is a crucial quality that any valuable employee should demonstrate in some form or another in the workplace. The term “leadership” can encompass a wide variety of actions and attitudes; it does not necessarily apply only to a single leader of a group. Leadership can manifest in small actions that can ultimately result in change – and as such, it is an essential part of the progress both of a company and of your individual growth as a professional.

As an employee of a company who is not in a position specifically defined as a “leader,” why is it important to demonstrate leadership, and how can you do it? Firstly, good leadership skills can help you advance within your company or field. If your supervisor and colleagues notice that you take initiative on a regular basis – by offering to organize a project, prompting a discussion or meeting, or tackling even a minute issue that has been ignored or delayed – they may recognize that you have the leadership skills that can apply to a larger set of responsibilities.

Remember, too, that leadership goes hand-in-hand with confidence: if you are confident in your skills and ideas and are willing to take risks by advancing them, your ability to lead will follow suit. Building self-confidence may not be a fast or easy process, but it is an achievement within any individual’s reach. A few basic tips for confidence in the workplace: first, always be prepared. You will feel the best about your work and your efforts to build relationships if you know that you have done everything you can ahead of time to begin a new project or complete a task thoroughly and correctly. In addition, dress for success and look your professional best in the workplace. It will give you more confidence to get up in front of people – whether in a one-to-one discussion, a small group meeting, or a boardroom packed with people – and then let your ideas do the talking.

It is important not only for individuals, but also for companies to build a strong foundation of leadership in order to effect long-term growth and sustainability. When the leaders of a company are competent and dependable, employees within it will come to trust in their company and invest themselves in their work. Yet there is concern that many companies and organizations today lack vital leadership: in an article last week in the National Post, Dr. Mary Donahue cited a current “leadership desert” in the US and Canada, and called for companies to re-evaluate and improve their means for cultivating leadership internally. In her article, she champions mentorship programs not only for passing knowledge to newer employees, but also (and perhaps more importantly) for what they can teach mentors about leadership by “forcing them to review how they lead and how they communicate excellence in the workplace,” as well as by helping “leaders learn how to provide context, define success, and enable their followers to fail and learn from their failures.” These experiences, Dr. Donahue claims, are indispensable for creating “staff satisfaction and loyalty.”

If Dr. Donahue’s prediction that the younger generations in the workplace will become increasingly uncommitted to organizations and their positions within them because of distrust in their leaders, then perhaps the call for improved leadership is an urgent one. This process can start with you, no matter what your professional position: because if you demonstrate your willingness and ability to lead, you may be the one in the future who is building the fundamental bonds of trust and inciting dialogue, creativity, and innovation among your colleagues.

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A captivating new phenomenon in business communication recently has emerged: office-wide social networking sites. Reading an article in The Globe and Mail last week detailing the pros and cons of this rapidly growing form of internal communication, I was struck by the possibilities for valuable discussion between all levels of employees that this casual forum enables. And yet I couldn’t help but wonder: what new questions or problems for communication etiquette could these sites invite? As I learned more about the sites and their benefits, I kept this question in mind.

The interfaces of company social networking sites such as Yammer may look like Facebook – but their purposes vary greatly. Instead of providing a space for posting photos and networking with friends and acquaintances, office social networks are limited to discussions within a company, and exist for sharing ideas or questions regarding projects, products, issues, or anything else traditionally addressed in a meeting or an e-mail chain between colleagues.

To me, this kind of in-office discussion seems ripe with potential. Providing such a familiar meeting space could allow employees to feel more relaxed about casually proposing ideas. It’s also a great solution to keep employees who are traveling, working off-site, or who otherwise couldn’t attend a meeting in the loop. And, as Carly Weeks of the Globe and Mail points out, such sites can “put an end to annoying, time-wasting and hard-to-follow e-mail chains between large groups of employees.”

What, however, could the downsides of company-wide social networks be? To start, analysts at research firms such as Forrester Research and IDC Canada argue that all employees – from senior level managers to Millenial-generation interns – must actively partake in the sites in order for them to be effective. Convincing all members of a company to participate could be a challenge.

But what really interested me was what the growing popularity of these sites could mean for business communication. As e-mail several years ago introduced an array of business communication faux-pas that some professionals still grapple with today, so might social networking sites invite a level of informality, which could be inappropriate when used in a discussion that your boss or manager could be contributing to as well.

How casual is too casual, when participating in an informal online forum? Although your colleagues may include some of your best friends, remember that everyone in your company will be able to see what you post – and that includes senior-level VPs. Therefore, retain a level of formality with your words. Don’t use Internet abbreviations such as “lol” and emoticons: you want your ideas to be taken seriously; let your language reflect that. In addition, even though these sites act as a space for informal discussion, do put some thought into your posts before you hit “send.” Even if the sites offer a “delete” button, you don’t want some colleagues to read words that you will later regret writing.

It will be interesting to see whether these company-wide social networks take off. Maybe they will go so far as to replace internal e-mail, or perhaps the excitement will simply fade out before the vast majority of companies have a chance to experiment with these new forums. Either way, remember – that no matter what the setting – your language and your communication skills will always represent you and your ideas. Keep them professional, tactful, and appropriate.

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Barry Kuntz, the Executive Director of the Black Isle Group sits with Diane Craig of Corporate Class in studio at ThatChannel.com, to discuss his unique training program that can take the most novice speaker and help them look like a seasoned professional in weeks… 

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Life is filled with meeting and greeting new people. Even though we’re reminded repeatedly; “Never judge a book by its cover,” we do. We’re constantly making snap judgments about the people we meet and greet. Curiously, it turns out, our first impressions tend to be quite accurate:

“We have long known that people jump to conclusions about others on the basis of very little information but what’s striking about these findings is how many of the impressions have a kernel of truth to them.”
– Psychologist Sam Gosling, The University of Texas at Austin.

In other words, we make assumptions, or jump to conclusions, with very little information and generally, we’re right!

Appearance, body language, intonation and interaction all work together to create a first impression. When they work in harmony, the result is positive. Let’s examine the four keys:

Appearance: What people see first
You may have seen the Tide® laundry detergent commercial with its clever tag-line; “Style is an option. Clean is not.” Although clearly, I do not agree with the first statement, I most definitely do, with the second. Fresh, clean clothes and impeccable grooming underscore a person’s social awareness; anything less implies a sense of carelessness. Sometimes referred to as “the unmentionables” —poor dental care, untrimmed eyebrows, nose or ear hair — send signals of negligence that sabotage even the world’s best haircut.

But back to style. It reflects our awareness of the world around us. I’m frequently asked to explain the difference between fashion and style. I guess my short answer is: Fashion could be defined as head-to-toe dressing in Banana Republic’s new Mad Men collection; (link http://bananarepublic.gap.com/). Style is incorporating elements—perhaps a narrow tie or pencil skirt —from that collection. In September’s Vanity Fair, American fashion icon Ralph Rucci answers the same question by explaining that Fashion is constant change, while: “Style is a continuum. It’s a refinement of the same vocabulary. Style takes you from day to evening, season to season.” Exactly!

Body Language and Intonation
A head held high is one of the magic keys to the Kingdom of Powerful First Impressions. It conveys an obvious sense of ease and a positive message. Who wants to be bothered with the round-shouldered guy in the corner whose chin rests on his chest? Pro-active is the way to go.

“We can pick up a smile from 30 meters away,” says Paul Ekman, professor of psychology at the University of California Medical School in San Francisco, and a pioneer of research on facial expressions. “A smile lets us know that we’re likely to get a positive reception, and it’s hard not to reciprocate.” When you consider that experts say we draw conclusions about a person in less than five seconds, a smile fosters a fine first impression.
During body language training, I help students learn very specific skills for mastering the art of conversation – fixed eye contact and the nuances of turning your body toward the person speaking; matching intonation and speech rate; unspoken responses that confirm the speaker’s message is clear. No question, there are subtleties about this training: the jokester learns to harness his stand-up routine; the passionate storyteller to edit her monologue and the inveterate interrupter to let the speaker finish his sentence.

Interaction
The ticket here is to make people feel welcome. It’s about “time-sharing” with a new acquaintance. Neither hogging the conversation nor expecting the other person to hold the fort.

Damage control
I’ve often heard so-called experts say; “When it comes to first impressions there are no second chances.” I strongly disagree. My experience as an image consultant has taught me that when interpersonal infractions occur, they’re often not intentional. However, when an infraction involves integrity, it’s very difficult for the offender to recover – getting caught in a lie, comes to mind. If on the other hand, the infraction is at a capability level, let’s say a person is on unfamiliar turf and clearly can’t follow the conversation, people tend to be more forgiving.

Misinterpretations: A few examples from real life
Meet Lucy – she thinks she’s listening to you attentively, showing tremendous interest. You keep talking and waiting for her to smile. And then you wait some more. Still no smile. Uh-oh. You’re starting to get a negative vibe. She’s just not there!

Point # 1: Smile to show engagement.
Meet Michael — he thinks, as he tells one joke after another, that he’s a funny, confident and positive person to be around. You feel he’s an obnoxious goof in desperate search of an audience.

Point # 2: Don’t be a road-hog. Share air time.
Meet Brenda – she thinks she’s informative and enlightening as she discourses with intense, detailed information about an endangered species she’s researching throughout the world. No detail is too minuscule. She even name drops in Latin! You can’t wait to escape her boring monologue and total self-absorption.

Point # 3: Curb your enthusiasm – when it comes to your own personal passion.
Meet Raymond – he thinks he’s showing interest in your recent holiday re-cap as he rudely butts in and interrupts. You can’t even finish a sentence and ask yourself; “Who is this self-centred twerp and why is he so disconnected?”

Point # 4: Don’t even consider interrupting. Ever.

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Bina Feldman joined our team this year and we are thrilled to be working with her.  Bina is a Speech Language Pathologist, now working as a speech coach.  She delivers Communication Skills workshops and offers one-on-one training and coaching. www.BinaFeldmanConsulting.com

We usually think of etiquette as rules for polite behaviour. They come from social norms. I often ask myself, what about the etiquette for speech and language?  Is it long gone or just forgotten?  Am I out of step with the culture of today’s youth, the way they speak, their communication innuendos or their idiosyncratic verbal style?

Why does speech etiquette matter to me?  It grates against my ear to hear speech that is littered with filler words that have no meaning and clutter the message.  I hear questions when none are intended. I identify muffled speech and words that say one thing and mean something else.  I call them SLEFs – Speech & Language Etiquette Faux Pas.

I know I’m not the only one who notices them. The boss, the client, the customer, the friend or family member is aware of them too.  What effect do they have on the listener?  I believe the listener responds negatively to these mannerisms, whether consciously or unconsciously.

So what is a Speech & Language Etiquette Faux pas? (A faux pas is a violation of accepted social norms.) A SLEF is any speech or language idiosyncrasy that diminishes your verbal style, sends mixed messages to your listener, or precludes a clear crisp message in communication.  One major problem with SLEFs is that the speaker rarely hears the pattern and may become defensive when it’s pointed out.

“Well that’s just me; it’s the way I speak.”  “You don’t understand. Everyone speaks this way.”  “You’re making too much of it, there’s nothing wrong with the way I speak.”

It appears that people, most often young and/or female (though not always), don’t seem to care that their speech and language reflects poorly on them and diminishes their message.  It detracts from a positive first impression. Like your handshake, your voice and speech are integral to your presence.  Ideally the speaker uses grammatically correct language that engages the listener.  SLEFs create a barrier between the speaker and the listener.  The listener must wade through the SLEF to receive the message.  It takes a lot of cognitive energy to listen that hard.

For business people and professionals, your verbal style will contribute to your success or undermine it.  In public speaking, presentations or negotiations, this style of speaking is especially noticeable.  It focuses the other person on how you speak rather than what you’re saying.

No doubt these are difficult patterns to break and yet it can be done.  If you suffer from SLEFS, take heart.  You can change poor speaking habits and convert them to stronger ones.  It’s well worth the effort.

Here are a few SLEFs that ring in my ear:

Upspeak
You’ve no doubt heard it so often; you may not recognize it any longer.  Most often it affects people less than 30 years of age.  Upspeak or uptalk occurs when a person makes a question out of a sentence that isn’t a question. This pattern of intonation demonstrates a lack of assertiveness and authority.  The speaker doesn’t inspire the confidence of the listener.  The speech pattern implies that you’re seeking continual approval and affirmation.

Learning tip: Tape yourself in conversations and identify when you’re using upspeak. Repeat the same words with a downward pitch at the end of the sentence. Use more inflection mid-sentence to encourage a downward drop at the end.  Speaking louder may help as well. Find a trusted friend who will send you a secret signal to speak “down” in the moment. I suggest the index finger pointing downward. 

Filler Words or sounds
“Like,” “You know,” “I mean,” “Truthfully,” “Well,” “Ahh,” “Um,” or a giggle/laugh

Filler words and sounds are problematic for many speakers.  Initially, they may have been adopted to give the speaker more time to formulate their message.  Eventually, they become habitual even when the speaker is certain of what they will say.  Most everyone uses filler words or sounds sometimes.  It’s when they punctuate a high percentage of phrases and sentences and draw attention to themselves that they interfere with listener concentration.  They become loud in the ear of the listener and send a negative message about the speaker.  Almost always the speaker is deaf to the high frequency of the filler word or sound.

Learning tip: Tape yourself in casual conversation or on the phone.  Count the number of times you hear your filler word or sound within five minutes.  Practice in conversation with a trusted friend or speech coach.  Try talking for 1-2 minutes without saying “that” word or sound. When you hear the SLEF, repeat the exact sentence without that word/sound.  Use a pause in its place.  Become more comfortable with pauses.  It may sound awkward at first, but persevere through your discomfort zone and you will succeed.

Mumbling
Mumbling comes in all ages and stages.  It’s about speaking indistinctly and quietly, making it difficult for others to hear.  Mumbling usually demonstrates a lack of energy on the part of the speaker.  It’s frustrating for the listener and can be seen as manipulative.  We hear mumbling often in the very young or the very old.  When an adult mumbles it’s especially disconcerting and considered rude.  It could be a sign of under confidence, shyness or fatigue.

Learning tip:

Mumbling most often results when the mouth opens very little during speaking.  The sounds created in the mouth are confined and warbled.  By speaking louder, the mouth will naturally open wider and the mumbling will reduce.  There are many physical problems that result in mumbling.  Provided these conditions don’t exist, the speaker must put more energy into her/his voice.

The basics of how to act in both business and social situations is what etiquette is all about. Verbal etiquette is equally as important. How well you express yourself; your fluency; tone of voice; volume; inflection; clarity of message; and grammar all contribute to a strong verbal presence. It may be a longer journey for some than for others, but it is well worth the trip.

More on presentations

• 3 Secrets to AWESOME Presentations
• 5 Tips to Creating Powerful Stories
• Pontification From The Mount
• How to Give a Winning Presentation – 6 Great Tips

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I was going to write a blog about it, but one of our classmates, Marguerite Orane beat me to it. I can only echo what she has written:

For the past two weekends, I have been immersed in Improv (aka Improvisational Theatre) training at the world-reknown Second City in Toronto.

“Improv?”  my friends asked when they heard “You plan to do standup?”  Well, no.  Truth is, I signed up because I thought improv would add to my facilitation and public speaking toolbox.  Oooohhh ….. little did I know what I would experience.

• 20 hours of being present – actually BEING present.  Not just talking about it, or meditating on it, but BEING it
• 20 hours of acting in the moment, of responding even when (and especially if) your mind is blank and you have no idea what you are going to say or do
• 20 hours of releasing attachment to thinking, of getting out of your head and into your gut (and heart)
• 20 hours of observing myself do crazy things, and not caring
• 20 hours of accepting myself  as I am with all my issues, boxes and isms
• 20 hours of trusting my classmates, that they would “have my back” (to quote Marjorie, our teacher)
• 20 hours of trusting myself – that I am enough, that I CAN do it, that I already have it in me
• 20 hours of laughter, joy, fun

Does it sound like 20 hours of being “free and laughing”?  Absolutely!   And did I learn anything, or was I “just” having fun?

• I learned that true learning is less about the skills, and more about the deeper shift in who I am
• I learned that to really learn, you have to be uncomfortable.  No shifts happen in a comfort zone
• I learned that when you don’t know what to do, do something – anything – just get the energy going
• I learned that being in the moment is hard – but possible
• I learned that every lesson in every course applies to my entire life.  I observed myself engaging with my children in a different way, using improv techniques – I have begun to see through “improv eyes”
• I learned that when you are having fun, the lessons are truly learned (actually I knew that already and it was great to be reminded)

Oodles of thanks to my amazing, brilliant and courageous classmates – Anthony, Auravelia, Barbara, Carolyn, Catherine, Chad, Dayna, Diane, Deborah, Janice, Jordan, Julie Lana, Rom, Tulla (ha ha – I remembered the names!) – and everlasting love and gratitude to our teacher, Marjorie, who gave completely and so generously of herself!

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As a person who talks for a living, I love precise language; I admire people who can say volumes in a few words. It’s an art to be able to laser in on the meat of an issue, cast aside the fluff and lay bare the essence of your thoughts, in brief. It’s especially wonderful to have a conversation with someone with those skills. An artful communicator is easy to trust.

Susan Scott, author of Fierce Conversation, says that the conversation is the relationship. So, what are the elements of a conversation that engender trust? And what can people do or say in a conversation that will make people want to trust them enough to take action on what they’re saying?

We decide whom to trust in a variety of ways. Our first impression of someone contributes heavily to whether or not we will trust, and then follow him or her. Simple things like appearance, tone, stance and how much we smile or not can impact the initial trust that people feel towards each other.

Honesty is a great trust builder. Telling the truth in every situation, especially when the truth might not be flattering, is a sure fire way to get people on board with you. I confess that I get suspicious of people who load up conversations with unnecessary personal stories or gossip; I wonder why they’re saying what they’re saying, and what they say to others when I’m not there. I like to chat with people that are straight forward, transparent and are willing to be vulnerable. I especially like those qualities in a leader.

The big trust factors are consistency over time and integrity. Trust is earned and is often based on our past experiences with a person. Burn me one, shame on me…burn me twice – well, you know. Most people don’t trust someone immediately; they want to see how someone performs each time they encounter them. When there is inconsistency in a person’s behaviour, alarms go off and people take an emotional step backwards into safer territory.

Ghandi said, ‘You can’t do right in one area while doing wrong in another – life is an indivisible whole.’ When we see people behaving one way with one crowd and another when the next it makes us uneasy and distrustful. We generally trust someone new with something small; we take a bit of a risk with them, then if that works out, we trust them with larger parts of ourselves, and our lives.

When you’re trying to influence people to take action on what you say, all the trust factors come into play. People will judge your appearance, your non-verbal communication, look at your track record and evaluate what they know about your level of integrity. If you make simple requests, with openness and sincerity you’re more likely to get a following than if you try to impress or bluster your way through the conversation.

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